HIATUS - a break or interruption in the continuity of a work, series, action, etc.
Because I am "on hiatus" this week I haven't really posted much in the area of "parenting lessons" this week so I am borrowing this post from my other blog, Everyday Bliss where I discovered that giving up on perfection was truly a path to my personal serenity! I hope you enjoy it!
From It's a Small World Ride Photo by "Disney Philip"
I've been hopping around the internet looking for tips or tools that will help us experience more serenity. I had an idea to possibly share the top five ways to inject Serenity or something like that when I stumbled across this: "see the glass as already broken!" then it all clicked! The number one reason I find serenity so allusive is that I am always expecting perfection. Not necessarily physical perfection, as that statement implies but perfection in how things are SUPPOSED to feel, look, be enjoyed etc.
Case in point, the other day The Girl was talking about the It's a Small World ride and how much she liked the African jungle part of the ride when I came up with the inspired idea to recreate that jungle right in our home. We strung ribbon across our living room. Made leaves and flowers. In no time we had quite the display.
Then very quickly I hatched a vision of an entire week of fun projects. We could make the leaves and flowers today. Tomorrow we can hang birds and other fun stuff (notice the party blower Sweets added!) and the next day would be butterflies and other bugs the next... I imagined "playing jungle" for days and singing "It's a Small World," reading jungle related books... a whole cornucopia of activities that would keep ME and The Girl interested in playing together.
What actually happened is we got as far as you see in the first photo and then she started asking things like, "When can we pull it down mommy?" and "I want to cut more mommy, PLEASE can I cut more??"
I spent the next day protecting my vision. "Sweets, please don't pull on it! Let's keep it up for Daddy to see!" Frankly it wasn't all that fun. Finally I relented and let her cut to her hearts content. It wasn't nearly as bad I thought. She really was quite deliberate in her cutting and we had a good half hour of cutting fun until she eyed the strings! And after the first string fell cry's to "fix it mommy" rang out and we hung it back up.
By not protecting it I had allowed Sweets to see the consequences of her actions AND it relieved so much pressure. I supposedly did this for her fun but when I got committed to how I wanted things to go it stopped being fun for either of us.
At this point in time a few strings remain. We may or may not add to them and next time Sweets asks "When can we pull it down?" I will happily say "How about right now?!"
So how about you? Where have you gotten committed to things being a certain way? What would happen if you let go of that? What if you approached already expecting things to go differently?
Disappointments are always possible but if we expect them and look at the glass as already broken it might very well be possible to enjoy what ever actually shows up.
Ahhh now that sounds serene!
[Inspiration for this post came from reading "A Beautiful Method to Find Peace of Mind" over at the Zen Habits website. Do check it out for even more tension relieving insights!]
Since this initial Jungle, the girl and I have recreated and developed this idea even more on subsequent occasions. Most recently we tried an ocean them and had a lot of fun making fish and seaweed.
Please note that because of the holiday weekend I will not be posting on Monday and will begin Fun Week on Tuesday! Hope you all have a great Weekend!!
Next Post: Let the FUN begin!
My 13 Virtues of Great Parenting are:
Fun, Discipline, Creativity, Love, Wonder, Listening, Curiosity,
Compassion, Trust, Acceptance, Empowerment, Humility and Flexibility.
This week is Hiatus week. Next week we dive into Fun!